Yes, applying a blue eyeliner took me to the depths of sorrow. Don’t be fooled by the innocuous title of the blog. This blog is sad and if you stop reading it, I completely understand.
Grief surfaces unexpectedly. One may be doing the most mundane chore, in this instance applying eye liner, and it hits one from nowhere. I was smiling about what ma would make of me now – this woman who applies blue eyeliner nowadays. The non fashionista daughter of a woman who loved to dress up. My ma had such a joyful energy in her youth. Her zest for life, her laughter, her desire to dress in bright sarees and bold lipsticks. But we didn’t have money so she had to improvise often.
And then I remembered what she used to say in jest about her own funeral. “When I die, make sure I have the best make up on, the best saree on. I want to go in style.” I used to say, “Yeah, yeah, you are not going anywhere.” Death was an abstract idea then. Death comes to all, sure. But not to my ma. What kind of world would it be without her. That world was outside the realm of possibility. A fantasy world. Covid made it real though. The complete failure of infrastructure in India made it real.
I was thinking about her desire to dress in her finest when she went on her last journey. Not only did she not get her wish, in reality, I didn’t even know which crematorium the hospital took her after her death. She died but baba was still alive. I did not even have time to properly grieve her because I was trying to arrange oxygen cylinders to keep baba breathing. Her last journey was not marked with honor or ritual or best saree and make up. She was a number, a statistic among all the other dead bodies that were piling up four years ago in Kolkata and all over India (and world). I was far away. But even those who were in the city could not say goodbye to their loved ones. Their mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, wives, husbands, children – all became mere statistics in death count.
Culturally I am Hindu. Hinduism talks about reincarnation. But it is hard for me to think I will never see my ma and baba again. That they will be born in different lives where they will not know me. I don’t think of my own mortality with any fear because I like to think they are waiting for me in a different realm. Once I cross over, we will be reunited.
I saw a beautiful sunset today. And some young buds which are ready to bloom. I always think the sunsets are more vibrant because they have ma and baba’s indestructible energy. The buds hold the promise of breathtaking beauty because my parents spread their essence in them. The peony that my friend gifted me after they died four years ago has come back to life this spring. I take comfort in the idea of renewal. But I hope they are waiting for me. One day my energy will meet theirs.
at work, or so I am told. I often hear my colleagues telling me “You are a bully.” I hope those words are spoken lovingly but lately I have wondered could there be a teensy bit of accusation in it? One day I was pondering upon my behavior and why it can look forceful to some who are not used to Bengali culture.
I invite everyone to eat together. I do have a golden retriever kind of energy. So my exuberant “Do you want to eat with us?” can seem too much. And I realize my energy can sometimes intimidate new people. Woah, tone it down lady!
My love language is food. I come from a culture where inviting people to break bread (or eat rice) is customary. We show love that way, even to strangers. I remember when visitors came in the afternoon, even after we had finished our lunch, ma or baba would say to them, “Kheye jao.” (Eat here). When I went to school, lunch time was special because we shared our tiffin. We bonded over food. In college, my friends and I would go to restaurants or the college canteen, pool our meager resources together, order what we could afford, and share everything. When I went to someone’s house, they insisted on feeding me too. The insistence bordered on bullying. But now, as I lose those people to eternal rest, I smile at their desire to heap food upon me. That was their way of showering their love.
It is in my culture to show appreciation, familiarity, love by inviting someone to the table. But I am not in Bengal. I sometimes forget I am in a country where my colleagues have had different upbringing. They may not want to eat with me or in a group. Many of them are introverted and want that 30 minutes of lunch time to recharge their people meter with some alone time. And my exuberance can seem like bullying.
Since I started self reflecting, I decided I am going to behave better, curb my enthusiasm, give people space, respect the culture here. Then I go to work, get genuinely happy seeing my coworkers, and ask, “When are we eating?” and “Come, eat with us!”
After the words leave my mouth, I think, “I failed. Again! I will try to behave tomorrow. “
One thing about the Galapagos was that we never had bad weather. I would open my eyes, look out of the window of the hotel and be dazzled by clear blue sky, a few errant fluffy clouds, and golden sunshine.
On the fourth day, our morning was free as we were going to meet our guide for Los Tuneles snorkeling tour at 11:20 am at our lobby. The tour agency who had arranged our trip suggested we take the morning to go visit flamingos in Flamingo Lagoon which was no more than 10 minutes walk from our hotel. So we did and were rewarded with a body of water filled with these pink, long legged, graceful birds either looking for food or just being – still, stoic. Just standing there looking at the flamingos and the stillness evoked a sense of calm. There was no one around us, not a sound. It was just the three of us and a lagoon full of birds.
We met our guide for the day, Carlos. at the dock who took us on a boat and explained to us about dry landing and wet landing before we started our journey to the lava tunnels under water where we were going to be snorkeling to see the various species of marine life of the Galapagos. Before we went to the dock, we were taken to a store to get wet suits and snorkeling gear. I am not a swimmer and very uncomfortable in water but I was determined to try snorkeling so I took my gear as well. Again, after an hour or so we arrived at the tunnels, the captain cut the engine and Carlos asked us to suit up and jump in.
I jumped in after Sean and immediately suffered a panic attack. It was in the middle of the ocean. I am claustrophobic. I had never snorkeled in my life and when the snorkel clamped my nose my brain panicked. I climbed back on the boat while the others went away from it to see the various forms of life under water. A universe that exists with all its splendor but we don’t get to see it unless we go on such snorkeling or scuba diving trips. The group was gone for more than 45 minutes and when they came back their excitement was palpable. They swam with sea turtles, dance with sea lions, and ducked way down to see white tip sharks at the sandy bottom. Even stoic Ryan kept saying “That was something else.”
While I was waiting for them on the boat, I saw a few sea turtles lazily swim by me. The most fun to witness was how a sea lion was playing with two snorkelers right next to our boat. Two young men were bobbing up and down near us, looking out for the sea lion. The sea lion popped up near them, turned its head to see where they were and slid under water again to encircle them. It was so clear that he was playing with the two humans. When the group was gone I sat by myself on the boat, lamenting my lack of confidence in water but I looked around me and gave thanks. I was sitting on a gently rocking boat in crystal clear, aquamarine water, under a brilliant blue sky. Everything was quiet, still. I could hear my thoughts and the occasional birdsong. Sea turtles floated by gently, gracefully. Colorful fish came close to the surface, perhaps to show me their beauty as a consolation prize. I felt lucky.
When the group came back, we had lunch on the boat. The lunches on the boats were very basic, somewhat plain so that folks with sea sickness had no trouble when the boats sailed. The fare was again plain rice, salad, boiled potatoes, and sautéed tuna steak with fresh lime. But before lunch, the boat took us to another spot for snorkeling only 15 minutes away from the first spot.
After lunch we went to see the lava rock formation on land. We all embarked from the speed boat and made our way on the sharp lava rocks. The Italian family who were with us on the boat said the lava tunnels resembled the bridges in Venice. We looked at the tunnels again and agreed. We looked down at the clear water to see more sea turtles gently gliding away, colorful fish, of course. The cutest, however, was a baby blue-footed boobie whose feet had not turned blue (it had not eaten enough fresh fish containing the pigment carotenoids) but it was just a matter of time. The baby sat there very close to us and our guide kept reminding us not to get too close to it. The baby exhibited no fear for the humans, which made me very happy. The parents sat a little distance away, perhaps to take a break from constantly feeding their very hungry baby. We also saw two Great Blue Heron siblings in a next, their necks extended, awaiting the return of their parents. They looked at us as we passed by them with relative calm. That is the ambiance I remember in the islands – in the people, nature, animals. Even when the sea lions fought with each other for a better spot on the docks to sleep, their fights lasted for a minute or two before they fell into deep sleep again.
I am an anxious person with constantly tight shoulders. On the islands, amidst this stillness, I felt my shoulders relax.
After the walk on the lava arcs, and the unforgettable experience, we were dropped off at our hotel. We strolled along the streets of beautiful Isabela island after dinner, taking in the daily lives of the islanders. We came across a small stadium, brightly lit up and packed with people, cheering on a two teams of senior volley ballers. We learnt that soccer and volley ball were the two major sports in Ecuador along with cycling. Volleyball definitely attracted the islanders as men, women, and children came together to cheer on the teams. We took the long way back to the hotel, looking at the twinkling lights of the restaurants that were away from the main thoroughfare and some tourists like us who were sitting at the tables looking at photos of their days on the phone.
26 year old, medical school drop out, young Charles Darwin landed on San Cristobal Island on September 16, 1835 and stayed in the Galapagos for two months visiting Isabela, Floreana, Santiago and of course, San Cristobal. He was an observer of nature on the British ship HMS Beagle and it was in Galapagos, by observing the variety of birds, animals, and vegetation, Darwin formulated his theory of evolution.
On the 3rd day of our trip, we met Caesar (who introduced us to the giant tortoises) at the lobby of our hotel and walked with him to Charles Darwin Research Center. The walk from our hotel took about 20 minutes. Our reward, once we arrived, was not only observing and hearing about the fantastic initiatives that scientists are taking to preserve the tortoise population but also the viewing of several baby tortoises whose lives are safe now from predators. The shells of the babies were marked with different colors to delineate which island they came from.
And we saw saddleback tortoises. The islands were named ‘Insulae de los de Galapagos’ or ‘Islands of the Tortoises’ due to the unique, saddle-shaped shells of the giant tortoises found there. And we saw them!
We also saw a mockingbird which are endemic to the islands.
After our visit to the research center, Caesar asked us if we wanted to eat good lunch at an inexpensive place. He took us to a restaurant where we ate lentil soup, rice and beans, and fresh tuna steaks along with fresh juice for $6.00. We invited Caesar to join us and learned about his life, his concerns about the government of Ecuador and his dismay at not enough being done for the people of the islands.
At 2:10 pm, a very nice lady, Ida, met us at the lobby of our hotel to bring us to the dock to board a speedboat to transfer to Isabela Island. The boat ride took about 2 hours. We had to sit inside, it was hot, and the sea was choppy. I was afraid I might get nauseous but I focused my eyes on the horizon and somehow escaped unscathed from the uncomfortable ride. At Isabela island, we paid $10.00 in entrance fee, dodged sleeping sea lions and walked till the end of the pier to find our ride. Our driver was waiting for us. We were picked up and dropped off at our hotel to spend the evening by ourselves.
After settling into our hotel, Sean, Ryan, and I walked towards the beach. We were awestruck by how beautiful the water looked once the setting sun’s rays hit the gentle waves. We found a restaurant by the beach and sat on the tables set by the sand for our dinner. I still remember the feeling of awe at the splendor of our first sunset at Isabela islands. I think that is my favorite island in the Galapagos.
After dinner, we walked around the beach and the big Christmas tree in the town center. And we petted every dog that crossed our paths. Isabela island, I found, to the least touristy and commercial than all the others we visited and it still evokes a warm, cozy feeling as I remember it.
The following day was going to be full of snorkeling adventures so we went back to the hotel to get some well deserved rest.
On the second day on Santa Cruz island, we met our guide, Meriam Leon in front of the Tortuga Bay on Charles Darwin street and got on a tour bus for about a 40 minute ride back to the Itabaca Channel to board the Espanola Yacht for our day long Seymour tour. We sailed for about 45 minutes to North Seymour and boarded a dinghy that took us to an arid island inhabited only by frigatebirds, blue-footed boobies, seals, sea lions, land iguanas, lizards, swallow tail gulls….
The walk, according to our guide, would take no more than 20 minutes but she wanted us to take it all in and not hurry. She did say that we should not be on the island for more than an hour so that other groups can have their opportunity to visit. We ended up staying for a little longer, and went back with images of male frigate birds displaying their vibrant red-throat pouches to attract the ladies, baby frigates peeking out behind their mamas showing us their fuzzy heads, a single blue-footed boobie, colorful lizards darting along the trail and iguanas moving like dinosaurs turning to look at us with stretched lips that almost looked like grins. I have never witnessed such a scene- birds and reptiles relatively unafraid of human presence. We were respectful. We were visitors on their land. We kept our voices down, we did not divulge from the marked trail and we kept respectful distance from the birds and animals.
As we headed back to the dinghy, Sean told me to stop moving, Ryan started laughing and I got nervous. Sean started taking photos of me while saying “Don’t move! Don’t move!”
“What is it? Do I have a bug on my head? Is it a tarantula? Oh my god, what is it?”
The others in the group also stopped in front of me and started wowing. Finally, I saw the photos and realized that I was the chosen one. A lovely grasshopper perched on my head. I actually held still till it flew away on its own accord.
I want to mention the delightful lunch that the staff at the yacht prepared for us. Once we returned to the yacht, we were offered lunch which constituted of white rice, boiled potatoes with queso on top, a simple salad of cabbage and tomatoes with fresh lime, and delectable tuna steak sautéed on a pan. For dessert there were slices of sweet watermelon. This simple fare was immensely satisfying and although we ate many good meals during our 10 day stay in Ecuador, I still fondly remember this lunch.
After lunch, we headed toward a beach for snorkeling. The water was crystal clear but I heard they couldn’t see much as people kicked up the sediment with their flippers as they swam. I did not snorkel since I don’t know how to swim and I am uncomfortable in water. While the group snorkeled, I went for a walk by myself till I came to a quiet inlet. There I saw a solitary flamingo deeply focused in getting his food. I stood there awhile, surrounded by sand, water, greenery and a solitary flamingo. That particular moment is ingrained in my head – a moment of communing between me and a bird that I will never see again. The flamingo was not even aware of my presence and I felt humbled to have the chance to stand there watching him.
The island of birds and reptiles, the crystal clear, aquamarine water, the flamingo in that quiet inlet, a heron sitting completely still; a stillness that very few of us can imbibe within us…. all these have stayed with me. I worry that memory may fade away with time so I am documenting it here. Maybe, in a few years, if I read this blog, I will relive the moment again.
On the 3rd day, we went to see the Charles Darwin Center and learned about the conservation work that many scientists are doing. We also saw saddleback tortoises and the baby tortoises that the staff of Charles Darwin Center are raising to release in the wild when they are five or six years old. But that blog is for tomorrow.
We left enchanting Quito on the morning of December 27th and arrived at Baltra airport a little after 1:15 pm. We were, fortunately, not left stranded here as a man from the tour company, Rebecca Adventures, greeted us at the airport and accompanied us for a 10 minute bus ride to the Itabaca Channel. From there we took a short ferry that took us to the Santa Cruz island and it was at the channel that we encountered our first brown pelican, boldly fishing right next to the boat we were on.
Once we crossed the channel, a pick up truck drove us to meet our guide for the day, Caesar. Almost 70 year old, Caesar was friendly, pleasant, energetic, well-informed and clearly extremely proud of his birthplace. As he drove us to see one of the several lava tunnels that dot the island of Santa Cruz he identified for us the flora, fauna, and different species of animals, reptiles, birds that are either native or endemic to Galapagos. Once we arrived at the tunnels, we got to see a couple of regulars – two barn owls who come to a cozy room to rest. The tunnels were short and well lit. An area was so narrow that we had to get on all fours and even crawl a bit to get to the other side.
After the tunnels, Caesar drove us to a ranch for a delectable lunch and then to meet with the much awaited giant tortoises.
I had read about these ancient creatures and seen pictures of them but seeing them in real time was an experience I am not going to forget. Many of them were over 100 years old. They were staid, steady, gentle. I felt humbled in their presence. Time seemed to slow down as we watched them eat the vegetation. They deliberately, slowly tore the grass, chewed them and went back to tear more. There was a slow rhythm to their movements that seemed almost hypnotic. I felt I could stand there and watch them do the same activity for hours. And as they ate, sometimes they exhaled with a gentle hmmmmmm….sound. That, to me, seemed almost meditative. Caesar is in love with these creatures and his love for them is evident in the knowledge and respect that he has for them. He introduced them as his friends. He has known some of them for over 40 years and has even named them as Caesar 1, Caesar 2, Caesar 3…till Caesar 8. And all these Caesars seemed to recognize the human Caesar’s voice. They heard his voice and raised their heads to pose for him. He introduced us to them and spoke to them as friends, asking how they were doing. Birds like Warbler Finches and Darwin’s Finches were flitting around, eating the seeds from the poop of tortoises, and the fleas and ticks on their bodies. Caesar explained to us the symbiotic relationship of all the birds, reptiles and animals in that natural habitat that keep the cycle of life intact. Endangering one species will tip the scale causing enormous damage to the whole system. We knew that theoretically, but seeing the cycle in action was a true revelation.
After spending a few hours with the tortoises, we were driven to our hotel in Puerto Ayora. Once we settled in, splashed water on our faces and cleaned up, we went out to the happening street Charles Darwin Street where all the restaurants, shops are. And there were sea lions fighting on the dock! The sea lions just claimed any bench or space on these islands and humans made space for them. We encountered the sea lions for the first time and we were super excited. During the course of our stay in the islands, these sightings became so common place that we almost took them for granted. The cutest were the little baby sea lions suckling or waddling behind their mamas.
Huge Christmas tree, lights, music – the merry ambiance made us forget that Christmas was over. In Puerto Ayora, the celebration continued.
We were expected to meet our guide at 7:45 am at Tortuga Bay to board a bus and then a boat to go to North Seymour for a day trip so we found a place to eat dinner and walked back to our hotel to get some sleep. I dreamt of tortoises.
As an Instructor and Research Specialist at the library I work for, I have been shushed by customer before. I have a loud laugh and I was laughing loudly with some fellow loud laughers on the floor of the library. A man came up to us and reminded us that this was a library. Shh……We were duly chastised and left the area giggling like teenagers. I am not talking about that kind of shame in this blog.
I opened my email one day at work to find an email from a colleague saying a certain customer was enquiring after me since he has not seen me at the gym for a while. I fell off the wagon for a long while leading a sedentary life on my couch with a book in my hand. I did go for walks but not regularly. Life just seemed bleak and I lacked motivation to do much. When I read that email, I felt a twinge of annoyance and also laughed a little. I didn’t think much of it. I did see this customer at the gym when I frequented the place regularly. We always said hello. I introduced him to my husband and he introduced us to his wife. Then I stopped going and looks like he noticed my absence.
At the beginning of December, I went to the gym. The first step toward going is hard. I didn’t want to but the customer’s enquiry shamed me into it (kind of). I knew exercising is good for me and it was sheer laziness that was preventing me from doing more for my health. On the first day I did not see the customer. I was a little disappointed as I wanted him to know I came to the gym because he nudged me. On the second day, I saw him and waved from the elliptical machine. He came over with a big smile. “You came?” he said.
“Did you sign up for 12 days of fitness? You get a free t-shirt. You should sign up.”
Groan. What is that?
“Errrr, maybe.” I huffed and puffed.
Before leaving, I asked the trainer about it. He said we can work out for 12 days in the month of December and after 12 days we get a free t-shirt. The days of workout do not have to be consecutive. So I signed up. Not because of my health but I love free t-shirts. Once I signed up, I was committed. I am very goal oriented. Once I had a goal I knew I had to fulfill it. So I kept going back and I started seeing a difference in my energy and a tad difference in my body as well as mental health.
I got my free t-shirt.
Later in the month, I saw the customer at the library. I went to him and thanked him for shaming me into going to the gym. I have been going regularly and also got my t-shirt. He laughed and said that they missed us at the gym. Nobody knows me at the gym, so no one missed me. He is just a sweet person.
I have now made it my goal to go to the gym at least 12 days in a month. I have even printed out a calendar to put up on my refrigerator to check mark the days I go. A visual reminder, for me, is important for accountability and satisfaction.
Lastly, I will say this again – public libraries change lives. The catalyst for those changes may be librarians, library workers, or customers.
After 8 hours of bumpy ride on our third day at the safari, I decided to stay at the camp instead of joining Sean in an evening safari. We had left Enkawa camp at 6:15 in the morning after witnessing a gorgeous sunrise. We rode all the way to Mara river to see a glimpse of the great migration of animals crossing the river. We saw some dramatic escapadse as I wrote on one of my previous blogs. We waited for hours to see a leopard and finally came back to eat a late lunch after 2:30 pm. Caleb, our wonderful driver and guide, turned to us with his brilliant smile and said, “So, should we go out again at 4:30?” My enthusiastic husband said an enthusiastic ‘sure!’ The other couple in the van also committed to the 4:30 safari to see a sunset in the savanna. I declined to get on that van again. My back declined. Instead, I decided to spend the evening enjoying the vastness in front of my very own glamorous tent.
I wanted to take a nice hot shower, I wanted to take a book, sit outside on the porch and take in the beauty in front of me.
I did just that. After Sean left, I took a luxurious shower, washed my hair, moisturized my body, took my kindle and sat on the camp chair outside our tent to read. It is hard to focus on written words when nature revealed itself in front of me in its resplendent glory. I must have been immersed in the words of Abraham Verghese (I was reading The Covenant of Water) because when I looked up I was startled. Right in front of me there were some zebras grazing. You have to understand I am a city girl. I was raised in the congested city of Kolkata. I live in the suburbs of US now and I get to see my share of deer, fox, rabbits and birds, but I never thought in my wildest (haha, see what I did there?) dreams that I will be sitting close to zebras grazing right in front of me. I will always remember that moment.
The first day we checked into the camp, we saw three wildebeests resting under a tree right in front of our camp. That was a magical moment too till we realized that they come there every day looking for shade during the heat of the day. We became used to their presence, but had never seen zebras that close. When Caleb and Wilson, our driver and spotter, picked us from the airstrip in Mara, they said they will take us on a safari tour before taking us to the Enkewa camp. Within a few minutes we saw a male ostrich prancing not to far from us. We whipped our binoculars out to see the deep pink color of this hindside and his legs. Male ostriches, we were told, turn pink when they look for a mate. Right after that we saw herds of wildebeests and zebras. I remember that moment being full of wonder. We had never seen anything like this before. The next day, however, herds of wildebeests, zebras, topis. antelopes, wild buffaloes, and even families of warthogs would become commonplace. While we appreciated seeing them, we would consider them part of the landscape as we saw animals that did not make them as easily accessible as these others, like lions, elephants, jackals, serval cats, rhinos, cheetas, leopards….
There were so many magical moments. The first time I spotted something orange that turned out to be a pride of lions, or when Sean spotted tall heads of giraffes from a bush and we drove next to them as they calmly looked at us and continued eating. The sun radiating its last light on the scruffy grass of the savanna dotted generously by the dark bodies of wildebeests or striped zebras. The buffalo families glaring at our van in a hostile manner as we drove by them. The curious face of the momma hyena as it interrupted her feasting on a dead wart hog to look at us, the onlookers.
Since I read Wordsworth’s poem, I Wondered Lonely as a Cloud as a child, I ingrained within me these lines:
“For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
In my mind’s eye, I revisit these magical moments. On my walk this morning, my mind had wondered back to the moment when I first saw the ostrich right after getting off our little plane in Mara. The first sighting of lions. the mama rhino whisking her baby away to protect it from us, the little elephant learning to kick tufts of grass from earth to dislodge it, the baby hippo lying on top of mama, the little jackal waiting to eat the remains of the lioness’ kill, the baby cheetahs playing with each other and mom. I have photos. But I also have them in my mind’s eye. I seek upon these moments in solitude and relive them all over again.
I often see on social media that some of my friends who have lost their loved ones, post ‘happy heavenly birthday’ wishes to the departed souls on their birthdays. Today, on ma’s birthday, I can’t post that. She did not believe in so called heaven. An ardent reader and lover of Rabindranath Tagore’s work, she believed in what the bard said. Heaven and hell is right here, on earth and one experiences them in one’s lifetime. Spread kindness, spread joy, spread good feeling. Recognize and worship the divinity within you and in others. You be true and you will experience heaven in your soul. Anger, bitterness, hatred will delve you into the chasm of hell. One doesn’t have to die to experience either.
On her birthday, I am not wishing her a happy heavenly birthday. Instead, my hope is that her energy, which is indestructible, is lighting up the universe in brilliant hues today. I see the energy of both ma and baba in every sunset, in striking color of the fall foliage, in every shining blade of grass, in every wave crashing on the shore. I am sure there will be a stunning sunset in some part of the world today and I know my mother’s energy will add that extra shine to it.
A few of her loved ones celebrated her birthday when she was alive. Nature will celebrate her birthday today as her energy is one with this beautiful earth of ours.
On ma’s birthday, this is my wish – may all of us strive to be kind. May we have empathy. May we recognize and respect the divinity in each of us. These wishes seem like a naive dream as the carnage continues in the world. But what else can we do but hope?
Ma ceased to exist physically. She lives on in my heart.
PS: I read what I wrote and distinctly heard ma’s big laugh. “My energy will brighten a sunset?? I would rather sprinkle my stardust on shiny jewelry, clothes, brighten the lights of a shopping mall. I can spend a little energy on sunsets, flowers, and waves for your sake and your baba’s sake! Who are you writing about? Don’t you know me?” I can almost hear her laughing voice in my head.
Ma was very materialistic. She loved shopping, fashion, make up and lamented the fact that I did not. I love nature, she did not care for it. So all that I wrote about her energy brightening up the universe is what I want to happen. She is probably laughing her head off at the thought of it. But since she did the terrible job of gently going into the night, I get to do what I want on her birthday. Write whatever I want to happen. And I want nature to pour all its beauty into every corner for all of us to see. So there!
whatmamathinks 