Author: madammommy

Victoria Memorial


I was watching a Hindi movie on Netflix last night, Metro In Dino by Anurag Basu. The locales were different metropolitan cities in India – Delhi, Pune, Mumbai, and finally Kolkata. In the movie, some characters (or a character, I don’t remember) drives through the street in front of Victoria Memorial in Kolkata. And the camera zooms in to a smoggy silhouette of the iconic Victoria Memorial built by the British to honor their queen Victoria, our colonizer. No matter the history of the building, it is undeniable that Victoria Memorial along with the Howrah Bridge are quintessential  landmarks to the skyline of the city.

As the silhouette of the building came up on the screen, I felt a jolt in my heart. A wistfulness. I would call it a pain even. It is hard to describe. I think I have been inside the building just once or twice in my entire life. The grounds, however, are a different story. We found ourselves on the grounds of Victoria Memorial for every school picnic since we were very young. We would all board the school buses, ready with our picnic lunches, badminton rackets, board games, and other picnic related fun things and head to Victoria Memorial in the winter. As I write this, I can still smell the oranges that were inevitably packed in everyone’s picnic lunches. We would put our things together on the grass, bask under the sweet, winter sun all bundled up in our sweaters and mufflers. We were out of the closed confines of the  classrooms for one day and we made the most of it. We laughed, shouted, played, ran (although not too far from the group). The teachers also got a break as they kept an eye on us, letting us be carefree little girls, as they talked among themselves. I believe there was some kind of teaching involved about the colonial rule of the British over India but the warmth of the sun and friendship are what I remember.

I went there with family too for picnics. We Bengalis are foodies so even our picnic lunches were elaborate. Luchi, alu r dom, cakes, oranges, and for some reason, boiled eggs.

And then I went there as a young woman with my boyfriend, now my husband. When Sean and I fell in love, Kolkata did not have a lot of places for couples to go to. The gardens of Victoria Memorial were a popular spot for young lovers to snatch some private moments far away from the prying eyes of friends and family. Kolkata was very parochial. Acquaintances seemed to be everywhere, coming out the woodwork. Sneaking away with your significant other far from the madding crowd was no easy feat. Since I was from Kolkata and Sean was not, it fell upon me to find secluded spots. But Kolkata is a congested city, so seclusion in my mind was simply avoiding relatives and prying eyes so word did not get back to my parents. Once I held hands with Sean as we walked the streets of Kolkata and a family member saw us. She promptly reported back to my parents about my public display of affection. An unmarried young woman was holding hands with a man, a foreigner at that! The scandal!. As expected, I got in big trouble for it. I laugh as I write this. How different were those days! Anyway, I digress. Back to me romancing Sean in Victoria Memorial. There were some beautifully lit dancing fountains on the grounds of the memorial. They played Rabindrasangeet (Tagore’s songs) as the water danced. A wisp of a memory has stayed in my mind. We sat in front of the fountain, mesmerized, holding hands (after making sure no relatives were hiding behind the bushes spying on me) as I sang for him. He did not understand a single word but he listened. We both were lit up by the lights that were lighting the fountains. Music played softly around us and perhaps, within us too. The beautiful marble of Victoria Memorial shone brightly in the moonlight. And then……

“Get out of here. Go! Out!” A police constable harshly interrupted our romantic moment. What? Why?

“Victoria Memorial closes at 7 pm. Leave. Now!” The constable must have kicked out lovers in scores every evening. And from his expression, I can safely deduce he had some fun doing it too. He gleefully interrupted us, thwacking his baton menacingly against his hand. Our perfect moment was shattered as we got up and made our way out of the gates with other disgruntled pairs of men and women. As the impressive gates of the Victoria Memorial shut with a clunk behind us, we were ejected into the chaos of the city and to reality – finding Sean’s car, navigating traffic, going home, lying to my parents about having double shifts at work.

Smoggy view of Victoria Memorial brought up all these memories. It evoked a feeling that is hard to explain. There was the feeling of loss yet there was also the happiness of my childhood and youth. I realize again and again as I get older that the sadness, the loss, the hurt, as well as the joys, the happiness, the memories of days past are all weaved within the tapestry of my life. I am who I am because I lived every one of those moments.

Living a small life


In one of my book clubs, I asked a question to my participants (mostly retired women), “How do you make friends at this age?” We were discussing How to Age Disgracefully by Clare Pooley. In the book, one elderly woman is determined to make friends so she makes a list of what she needs to do. I was curious. How do people at a certain age make friends? The resounding response was it is hard. One has to get oneself out there. Some said they joined book clubs at the library to meet people, one person throws parties at their house, some joined kayaking groups, gymnasiums, hiking groups – all in an effort to form a connection with another human being. One person said they are so comfortable in their home that they would never come out if they didn’t have five book clubs to go to. Some had lost their partners, the children have grown and moved away, and now they are alone.

I thought about my life. I am in a new phase in life. The youngest is still in college but he is far away. And when he comes home, it seems like he has outgrown this home. He is eager to make it on his own. The oldest has made it on their own, moved out, doing well. That stage of insanity in terms of work, dinner, practice, homework, swim meets, basketball, baseball, softball, choir practice, cello lessons are behind me. Now it is work and then home. A walk after work, quiet dinner, and then a book. On Mondays each week, I think this coming weekend I am going to do something, maybe go to the city, see some excitement. Then Thursday comes around and I get tired. The weekend plans hardly materialize. Some close friends from India asked me the other day, “What’s going on with you? What’s new?” I have no answer to that. My life truly is simply going to work and coming home. A small life, as I learned from the book Mrs. Queen’s Rise to Fame by Olivia Ford.

If I hadn’t read Debbie Tung’s Quiet Girl in a Noisy World, I would worry something is wrong with me. I say that because this small life suits me well. Even as a teenager, I loved staying at home. My mother was surprised when I didn’t put up a fight when she dictated that I was responsible for walking the dog each day at 5 pm right after college since the dog was mine. While all my friends went to movies, stayed at campus spending time together, I dutifully got on the public bus and headed home. After walking Nabab, I stayed home to read, do homework, hang out with Ma. I did complain a few times but my love for my dog obviously was more than my desire to spend time with friends after class. I never truly had FOMO (fear of missing out, a term I learned from my kids) and I don’t have it now.

I was talking about the small life I lead with a friend at work who also likes to stay home. And she correctly pointed out the difference between being lonely and being alone. Are you content being alone? Yes. Like the participant in my book club, if I didn’t have to go to work, I could stay home all day and not talk to a soul. Having said that, I work at a public library, where my people energy is depleted after spending time with people for 7 and a half hours. I don’t know if I would feel the same way if I did not have a job. Will I seek out company? I will find out in a few years. Retirement here I come.

Mama’s British Birthday Bash – Stratford-upon-Avon


Instead of a Shakespearean quote, I will start with Sahana’s notes instead because they are funny!

back ache reaches terminal velocity. lug all of our worldly possessions to waverly station for leg 1 of the trip – the stairs were easier on the way down
figure out the trains & grab a bagel for sahana & coffee for mom before a 4 hr train ride to birmingham
HAVE TO CHANGE STATIONS IN ONLY 30 MINS and had to CLIMB MORE STAIRS (w/a bad back!)
almost an hour on the train to stratford upon avon – shakespeare silhouettes everywhere
arrive in stratford and have to climb stairs up and down 2x
arrive at ashgrove early but our room is ready & we dump stuff and RUN to anne hathaway’s cottage
prettiest path you ever did see with hedges and flowers.
cottage is cute too.
hungry now, walk back downtown and look for food – more Thaii (giggling squid)
post meal – we decide to wander (everything closed at 5 pm! weird weird)
walk past: shakespeare’s school, his home’s site, burial site, baptism site, Avon river, Trinity Church + graveyard, then bathroom need strikes
bathroom need satisfied
continue to walk to birthplace and then – very early – head back
sleep early in (mostly) comfort. sahana has whole bed – mom on the floor.

Friends, when Sahana writes backache reaches terminal velocity, they are not kidding. I woke up that morning with excruciating pain in my back. I have never experienced such back pain ever before. Standing up straight was somewhat ok, but moving in any way or even sitting was painful. And we had to catch the train to reach our destination – Stratford-upon-Avon. Here I will mention one of our regrets in the trip. We had initially planned to spend a night at Manchester. Then we canceled that plan and tagged a day on to our stay at Oxford. We should have stayed an extra day in Stratford. You will know why if you read on.

We took our luggage to the Waverly Station. Fortunately, walking was not too painful and I didn’t have to haul the luggage too much, I could drag it. But the train ride, for me, was uncomfortable. I kept standing up and stretching my back as much as I was able. Once we reached Birmingham, we had to run to another station! IN 30 MINUTES! WITH BACK PAIN! UP AND DOWN STAIRS! WITH OUR LUGGAGE! But we made the connecting train and I survived to write this blog.

We got off at the pretty station of Stratford-upon-Avon and saw steel silhouettes of the bard everywhere.

Our check in time at our AirBnb was at 4 pm but we had arrived early. We decided we would ask if we could leave our luggage with them but the sweet co-owner of the place welcomed us in and showed us our very cute room. We dropped our luggage and walked towards Anne Hathaway’s cottage. The walk to the cottage was one of the prettiest walks that we have taken. We strolled through English gardens complete with hedgerows, blooming flowers, pretty houses. The cottage was also very picturesque. I kept thinking of Maggie O’Farrell’s Hamnet where O’ Farrell makes Anne Hathaway the protagonist. Sahana and I walked around the beautiful garden around the cottage and took some photos of the flowers and us.

When we got back to the town center, we were hungry. All the other sites that we wanted to see were closed at that point anyway, so we ate some Thai food at Giggling Squid (much to our disappointment, we discovered that it is a chain).

And then we wandered. We leisurely walked past Shakespeare’s school, the site of his home, his burial site, Trinity church, Avon river and then…………..bathroom need strikes. Listen, these are very practical aspects of travel and should be taken seriously. We walked back looking for Starbucks only to discover that Starbucks also closed at 5 pm. Why?

Anyway, we went back to Giggling Squid and asked them to use their bathroom. They were kind and allowed us. After bathroom need was met we walked by a cute plaza, took photos with a statue of Shakespeare. I ate a Kwality Walls ice cream and headed back to our room very early. We cleaned up and went to bed. Except Sahana slept on the bed, I slept on the floor. The soft beds of England were the death of me.

By the way, I forgot to mention our total step count in Edinburgh in my earlier blog. It was 54, 184. We walked 21.76 miles there.

Stratford-upon-Avon tracked only 17101 steps, 6.85 miles. Dismal.

I went to bed concerned about my back and if it will limit me in any way. Before falling asleep I remember thinking, I am going to see everything I came to see. Achy back can’t stop me. Where are those pain meds and heat pads?

Mama’s British Birthday Bash – Last day in Edinburgh


“There’s no leaving Edinburgh, No shifting it around: it stays with you, always.” – Alan Bold

On June 4th, a day after I turned 55, I woke up from my bed at our rental in Edinburgh with a strange backache. I attributed it to soft bed. We had to hurry as we planned to reach Burns Monument to catch our tour bus to drive out to see Stirling Castle and some other sights. Sahana wrote some funny phrases about this day and I am going to quote them in this blog as reading them made me laugh out loud.

“mom wakes w achey back. this is 55. we vamoose up and down and up to burns monument for hairy coo bus and arrive 30 mins early – what can u expect from the two of us.
hairy coo bus arrives (bruce guide and ross driver) and we embark!”

What, indeed, can you expect from the two of us? I am extremely anal about time and punctual to the dot. It was such a joy to travel with Sahana because I seemed to have raised a mini me in this regard. We discussed a time when we wanted to leave. Both of us were ready with our shoes on and bags on our shoulders right on time. Then we looked at each other and beamed. So yes, we left early, grabbed something to eat, went up and down the steep roads of Edinburgh to join the line to board our bus for the day. The bus was supposed to leave at 8:30 sharp and so it did. A jovial man, red faced and happy, and wearing a kilt, introduced himself and the driver – Bruce and Ross. Bruce was going to be our guide and Ross was our driver. We heard about the day ahead of us as we left Edinburgh. First stop was the Kelpies. The Kelpies are a pair of huge horse heads made of steel. I will be honest, while they were impressive and the area was beautiful, I did not love them as much as I loved some of the other sites. I could easily have given this a pass. And now I will insert some of Sahana’s note because they are funny and they are true.

“we visit: kelpies – baron and duke (then mom naps), balloch and loch lomond + cruise with chatty alaskans (then sahana and mom nap), then aberfoyle for lunch (then both nap), hairy coo sighting and feeding of honey and hamish (baxter uninterested), then stirling castle to round us out (both nap and miss bridge explanation), bridges (then probably more napping otw to edinburgh). sahana drank very little water all day (stupid). ramen for dinner (fortifying and delicious).”

There you have it. That is what we did. But while we were visiting the Kelpies, Baron and Duke, we also saw mama swan and fuzzy baby swans swimming towards the horse heads. That was pretty.

Our next stop was Balloch. We decided to get boat tickets and take a cruise in the loch. As you read in Sahana’s notes, a very chatty lady from Alaska sat next to us. She wanted to know everything about us, what we were doing, if we will go shopping (NO!) and then proceeded to tell us all about her trip, her daughter’s plans, their home in Alaska, their other travels. Both Sahana and I nodded politely, trying to look at the beautiful nature around us. I doubt if the lady paid any attention to the hills and the lush green around the loch.

Then it was lunch time at Aberfoyle. We went to a cute restaurant where the server asked us how much time did we have before the bus left. We told her, she considered what we had ordered, nodded her head and said, “Ok, we can get this in time.” While we waited for our food, we enjoyed watching the antics of a puppy at our next table. I want to write these little moments down because they are such integral parts of our joy of traveling. We both loved the fact that dogs are allowed inside restaurants, not just service dogs.

After lunch (steak and ale pie for me and something with bacon for Sahana), we went to see hairy coos. Honey and Hamish were interested in us and the food that we held to feed them. Baxter, however, could care less. He was doing his own thing, and did not give us the time of the day. Honey and Hamish made up for it with their cuteness. We could stand there all day, except Honey decided to take a dump. The smell was so intense that it broke the magic charm and we quickly walked away and embarked on our bus again to head to Stirling Castle.

Bruce was doing his best to tell us about the history of all the places we visited. But here is the thing though. I kept falling asleep! And missing a lot of the information. As you may have read in Sahana’s notes – mom kept dozing off. And Sahana then kept dozing. Poor Bruce. I made sure I gave both of them good tip after we came back to Edinburgh. The bus was so comfortable and we were very tired after 4 days of non stop walking.

View from Stirling Castle

Sahana was feeling dehydrated, we both were exhausted and in dire need of sustenance. We ate the best ramen of our lives in Edinburgh. I don’t know if the ramen was the best or if it was our hungry and tired soul that found the ramen fortifying and nourishing. No matter, our food loving souls were satiated.

With renewed energy, we trudged back to our apartment and crashed. The following day we were headed to Stratford-Upon-Avon. It was a day of pain and adventure. Stay tuned.

Mama’s Birthday Bash – Edinburgh (on my birthday!)


“Half a capital and half a country town, the whole city leads a double existence; it has long trances of the one and flashes of the other; like the king of the Black Isles, it is half alive and half a monumental marble.” – Robert Louise Stevenson

Edinburgh News informs us that “Despite being set in London, Stevenson’s famous tale of Jekyll and Hyde is thought to be heavily inspired by Edinburgh because of this ‘double existence.”

We did not have to wake up at the crack of dawn on my birthday because our first activity – historic tour of the Royal Mile by Mercat tours was not till 10 am. I woke up to lovely birthday wish from Sahana, got dressed for the day and left our apartment for a full Scottish breakfast at Edinburgh Larder. We had heard the restaurant was popular and often, there were lines to get in. Fortunately, we had arrived early enough and found 2 seats right away. We shared a full Scottish breakfast between the two of us, complete with haggis (savory pudding made with sheep’s heart, liver, lungs, oatmeal), blood sausage, toast, eggs, mushrooms etc. Neither haggis nor blood sausage tasted good but at least we can claim we had Scottish breakfast. It was a gastronomic experience. After breakfast we had time to kill before our tour (and also needed a bathroom) so we bought a coffee at Starbucks and waited.

The walking tour was truly informative and also entertaining. Our guide, Veni, was witty and knowledgeable. We learned a lot about the history of Scotland, and especially, the Royal Mile which extends between the Palace of Holyroodhouse at the bottom to the Edinburgh Castle at the top. Don’t let the name fool you. Scottish Mile is longer than a regular mile. We were told the Royal Mile in reality is 1.13 mile which is supposedly old Scots mile, different from English mile.

Our tour ended at the Edinburgh Castle. Veni took us inside the castle, told us about the history of Scotland and the castle’s significance in its history and left us to our own devices. The weather was funky that day. There was constant interplay of rain and sunshine. The wind, however, was constant. Sahana wrote in their note that it was ‘windy af’ and I will include that to make you understand how windy the day was. We got wet and then the sun came out to dry us up till the rains came back to wet us again. Anyway, we took our time enjoying the views of Edinburgh from the ramparts of the castle. We stayed to watch the 1 pm gun shot that is quite a spectacle at the castle. We went in to the csstle’s cafe for some nourishment and found a table with a fabulous view.

From the castle, we meandered down looking for the Writer’s Museum which has exhibits of the three famous literary figures from Scotland – Robert Burns, Sir Walter Scott, and Robert Louise Stevenson. We looked at books, manuscripts, portraits and personal items of the three stalwarts of literature who hailed from Scotland.

Towards the end of our tour of the museum we both were getting very hungry. Instead of a birthday dinner, we decided to go for a sumptuous meal that worked as both lunch and dinner at an Indian restaurant called Dishoom where we got authentic Kolkata style chicken roll. I was elated! Although I had my doubts as we entered the restaurant as all the staff appeared to be white but the food was so good that I forgot all my doubts. It was indeed a delightful birthday meal. Sahana assured me that the people making the food must be desi.

After a good meal our spirits were high. We had to check out the Burns monument since we were supposed to catch our Hairy Coo tour bus next day from there for our day trip. We walked over to the Burns Monument and then to Old Calton Cemetery where we saw David Hume mausoleum.

We continued our walk to the new Calton cemetery. Since we were halfway there, we decided to see the Palace of Holyroodhouse where the Royal family still stays when they visit Scotland. On a whim, we decided to buy tickets (yet another treat from Sahana for my birthday) for the palace and explore the royal palace where English monarchs have stayed for generations since 12th century. The impressive front of the palace was bathed by sunlight when we visited and the limestone structure looked like it was glowing. We took an audio tour of the building and was amazed and awed by the history that we were witnessing.

When we came out of the palace, we looked up in the distance, we saw the famed volcanic peak, Arthur’s Seat. Not only was it majestic, it was also mind boggling that the stone and flint tools found there reveal human activity as far back as 5000 BC. When we had our fill of seeing and photographing Arthur’s Seat, we slowly made our way up the Royal Mile to go back to our apartment to rest for an hour before another Mercat walking tour. This time it was going to be an adult only ghost tour of the Royal Mile – Dead, Doomed, and Buried. This was another birthday gift from Sahana. I have asked for Ghost tours from my family as birthday gifts for the last two years. I am not sure what says that about me….

That rest was vital since both of us were so tired from walking all day. We saluted the Edinburgh castle visible from our balcony and plopped on the bed for an hour. With restored spirits and tired legs, we headed out to meet Shannon from Mercat Tours to hear about all the spooky tales of the historic Royal Mile. Decked in a black cape and adorned with fascinating orange and black eye make up, Shannon was an excellent guide who took us all the way down the Royal Mile regaling us with tales of murder and mayhem and ghost sighting (some in our group felt a presence. Alas, we didn’t). Then we went down the vaults of South Bridge and things started getting creepy with ghostly lights and confined passages. But this is what I love about ghost tours. Scarier the better.

We were really exhausted after the tour ended. We found ourselves again at the bottom of the Royal Mile and had to trudge uphill to get to our apartment. I believe we went up and down the Royal Mile at least 3 times that day. But we had to stop by yet another cemetery – Greyfriars Kirk and Greyfriars cemetery, since it was on our way.

I must say the light was fading and the cemetery started looking really empty and spooky,, especially after listening to incidents of paranormal activity from Shannon, so we slowly strolled out of it and continued on our way back. Sahana got hungry and Sainsbury, a popular supermarket chain all over UK, saved the day. As a final birthday gift, Sahana bought me my favorite – Cadbury Fruit and Nut chocolate.

With food and chocolate in hand, we climbed the Royal Mile again, came back to the apartment and ended our day and my very fulfilling birthday.

I think people should celebrate their birthdays exactly the way they want to – party, quiet time, spending quality time with loved ones, eating food of their choice. This year, I spent my birthday exactly the way I wanted to. I saw, I learned, I laughed, I experienced, I ate. And I shared all of that with one of my most loved ones.

Mama’s British Birthday Bash – Edinburgh


Into no other city does the sight of the country enter so far; if you do not meet a butterfly, you shall certainly catch a glimpse of far-away trees upon your walk; and the place is full of theatre tricks in the way of scenery.  You peep under an arch, you descend stairs that look as if they would land you in a cellar, you turn to the back-window of a grimy tenement in a lane:—and behold! you are face-to-face with distant and bright prospects.  You turn a corner, and there is the sun going down into the Highland hills.  You look down an alley, and see ships tacking for the Baltic.

                Robert Louis Stevenson

We packed up relatively early and checked out of Tavistock hotel in London to go to Charing Cross Railway Station to catch our train to Edinburgh. We arrived at the station early because we wanted to see the famous platform 9 ¾ from where Harry Potter boarded the train to Hogwarts. Boy, was that a disappointment! Disney has commercialized it to the extent that they are charging 20 pounds for pictures. And people were lining up to shell out the money. Not us. We went and got bad coffee instead and boarded our train. The train ride was everything that we had envisioned. Lush English countryside, cottages, ugly apartment buildings as we neared big cities, people and dogs walking along meadows, plump sheep, and healthy looking cows – we saw all these as the train thundered along. We read some, dozed a little, and looked out the window, taking in the scenery. The vista changed as the train neared Edinburgh. From lush green flat land to rocky hilly areas and the ocean in the distance. We had sunny weather in London but the sky turned grey as the train brought us to Edinburgh.

We finally arrived, dragged our luggage out of the train station and were confronted with steep steps to go up to our AirBnb. We looked up in dismay, took a deep breath, and picked up our suitcases.

My months of work at gym paid off. I was able to conquer the steps and arrived close to the magnificent St. Giles Cathedral.

Since our rental wouldn’t be ready for another hour, we found a pub to get a drink and some food while we waited. Sahana ordered a Loch Lomond stout while I ate a bland chicken pie and people watched. When it was time, we found or rental, dropped our luggage, arranged our stuff and cleaned up. The best part of our rental was the breathtaking view of the Edinburgh Castle from our balcony, spread out in all its Gothic splendor atop a high cliff. Every time we caught a glimpse of that imposing structure, we stopped in our tracks.

After an hour or so in the apartment, we headed out to explore Edinburgh. Sahana had booked a History Walk of Royal Mile walking tour and a ghost tour of the Old Town for the next day so we decided to explore the part of Edinburgh which were off the beaten track. Thanks to an influencer in TikTok, Sahana found out about an area called Dean Village which, on our phones, looked simply beautiful. When we navigated our way there, the village we realized that the pictures did not do the village justice. Dean Village is a green oasis amidst the city of Edinburgh. It was originally called The Water of Leith village, a bustling milling village found in the 12th century. We came across some stone plaques with bread and pies depicted on them. As we looked down on to the residential buildings in the village, it looked like a town from a fairy tale; pretty, neat, picturesque, and sleepy. Situated next to the Water of Leith, the quiet walkways along the gently flowing river could easily make one forget that this tranquil space is actually within the heart of a bustling city. We walked the pathways, protected by dark green foliage above us, listening to the sweet rustle of the running water next to us and  boisterous bird song around us.

From Dean Village we walked to Stockbridge, admiring its dark Georgian architecture and quaint cobble stoned streets flanked on both sides by cute, mostly independently owned shops. We strolled towards pretty Circus Lane and took pictures of the fronts of daintily painted houses decorated with flowering bushes. The sun was hitting it just right for us to admire the prettiness of the whole neighborhood.

At this point, both of us were getting tired and hungry. We stopped at Rosa’s Cafe for some delicious Thai food before slowly making our way back to our apartment. Sahana tested my navigation skills to take us back to our rental. I failed. I was so busy looking at the sights around me that I did not pay attention to the road that led us back to our temporary abode. Fortunately Sahana knew exactly where we were headed.

Before wrapping up this blog I want to mention one (of the many) joy of traveling with Sahana. One of the commonality we had was our mutual love for food and our lack of discernment in a good way. This is important, especially for me, because my husband is a vegan who doesn’t eat most vegetables. We are great travel partners except when it comes to food. We are limited to the number of restaurants that we can go to when Sean and I travel. With Sahana, it was such a delight to ask “Do you want _____ food?” “Yes, let’s go.”

During the span of two weeks, we shared and experienced some wonderful memories and sights. We also ate some amazing food. And it would be remiss of me if I don’t include them in my blogs.

June 3rd was my birthday. Sahana had planned some special activities for that day, so we read for a few minutes and went to sleep to be up and ready for birthday adventure.

Mama’s British Birthday Bash – London


“London opens to you like a novel itself… It is divided into chapters, the chapters into scenes, the scenes into sentences; it opens to you like a series of rooms, doors and passages. Mayfair to Piccadilly to Soho to the Strand.”– Anna Quindlen

“How about we go to England for your birthday?” Sahana asked me some months back. And I said, “Yes! Let’s go!”

It all started long time ago when Sahana was 2 or 3 years old. Every day after they came back home from preschool, we snuggled together and read three books. I am not sure who decided on that number but that is what we did. A life long love for stories and books sprung in their heart which culminated in a degree in English literature, a flair for reading, writing, and appreciating literature. I have always loved literature too. This year I decided to give myself the gift of a literary tour with my daughter to celebrate my birthday. And what a trip it turned out to be!

Sahana finished their work at 4:30 pm on a Friday and we started our journey at 5:00. Both of us were bursting with excitement and couldn’t wait for the plane to take off. The plane, however, stood at the tarmac for close to 3 hours due to bad weather. Sahana and I looked at each other and laughed nervously. We both hoped that this delay was not a precursor to what was to come in our travels. Since we had booked a direct flight and since nothing was in our control anymore, we both decided to take the delay in our strides and watch a movie while we waited for the plane to move. It did finally take off and we landed safely on the other side of the pond seven tiresome hours later.

Sahana had bought an eSIM from Vodaphone which refused to work when they tried to activate it at Heathrow airport. Fortunately, they were able to trouble shoot and it did finally work so we could navigate our way from Heathrow to our hotel Tavistock in the Bloomsbury neighborhood. Here is a public service announcement, readers. Do not activate your eSIM till you arrive in the country where you want it to work. Once the eSIM started working, Sahana expertly navigated us to the right platform from where we took a train heading towards Cockfosters. Cockfosters? Really? We both looked at each other and laughed. We found our hotel and  were thrilled to discover that Virginia Woolf and Leonard Woolf lived at the premise of our hotel from 1924 till 1939. Our literary tour started with a bang.

We checked in, dropped our bags, splashed some water on our faces and ran out to explore the British Museum. It was already late afternoon and the museum closed within a few hours. It was just a few blocks from the hotel but the line to enter the museum was long. Would we make it in time? We joined the queue anyway. We made it.

What can I write about the British museum and what it houses? It was fascinating, mind boggling, anger provoking (for someone who belongs to a former colony of England and whose treasures were forcefully taken and now are exhibited in this foreign museum)……I am honestly running out of words to express how we felt as we stood in front of exhibits that have survived thousands of years. Our first stop was the Rosetta Stone. We stood there in silence for a while, unable to fathom the reality that we were truly in front of the object that unlocked the mystery of an ancient civilization and through which we could glean so much information about the ancient Egyptians.

We made our way to the Indian exhibits, Roman, Grecian, and of course, Egyptian.

As the guards started telling the visitors that it was time to close, we made our way out of the museum – speechless, sated, and also dazed.

And then started our endless walks. We walked all the way to Soho, ate delicious fish and chips, steak and ale pie, and sticky toffee pudding. Walked back to the hotel and crashed.

The next morning we left early and took the tube to a station close to the Tower of London. But we needed food to fortify us so we could spend hours touring the Tower. It was very early on a Sunday morning, and none of the restaurants or cafes were open so we had to make do with a very ordinary breakfast at a hotel and then walked the entire length of the Tower bridge. The Tower of London was not open yet.

We toured the Tower of London for over 4 hours. We spent the first hour listening to the fascinating albeit horrifying and gory history of the Tower told by a witty Yeoman Warder.

The Yeoman Warders have guarded the Tower since its construction and they guard the Tower still. After spending so many hours at the Tower, both of us were depleted of energy and needed sustenance pronto, which came in the form of delicious crepes sold right in front of the Tower. With crepes in hand we started walking towards the City of London or Londinium. Londinium or Roman London is believed to be the capital of Roman Britain during Roman rule. We sat in front of the Guildhall for a while to rest our legs and then went in the Guildhall where we saw the ruins of a Roman amphitheater which existed beneath the Guildhall. The number of centuries buried beneath the city is fascinating. We took our time exploring the area till our jetlagged bodies needed some spurt of energy to continue going. And strong coffee from a nearby Pret a Manger provided just that.

After a coffee break and a water break, we continued to walk till we found ourselves in front of St. Paul’s Cathedral. While we took in the beauty of the magnificent church, both Sahana and I paid close attention to the Bengali spoken by a family walking near us. We both looked at each other with joy. We heard Bangla! That would become quite commonplace during the entirety of our travel as many people from our part of the world travel to England to tour (or live) and we would hear Bengali, Hindi, Urdu and other Indian languages a lot. From St. Paul’s we walked to Leadenhall market (which failed to impress us), the Monument to the Great Fire of London. Then we slowly meandered across the (unimpressive) London Bridge and found a great Chinese restaurant for some very satisfying noodles.

The final act of the day was watching a performance of Romeo and Juliet at Shakespeare’s Globe Theater. We walked through Borough Market as we made our way to Globe Theater. Unfortunately, the market was closed. We would have loved to explore this open air market. It seemed fun.

The performance at Globe Theater and the Globe Theater itself were everything that we had hoped for. The theater and the way it is set up did give us an idea how audience enjoyed theater at the time of Shakespeare. Romeo and Juliet is one of my least favorite among Shakespeare’s plays, but the performance gave me goosebumps. The environment, the iconic theater, the bard’s words, and the expertise of the actors – everything was superb. Sahana and I left the theater starry eyed and completely mesmerized. As we walked to a train station through the quiet Borough market, we animatedly discussed the play and the theater till we saw a fox stealing food from a rubbish bin right in front of us. A fox! In the middle of the city of London!

We came back to our hotel completely exhausted, completely satisfied, and so very happy that we were on this journey together. Mother and daughter discovering a new country where many of their idols in literature lived, experienced, felt, wrote.

We were leaving for Edinburgh next morning. I will write about our Edinburgh experience in the next blog. I will end this blog with our step count because we had fun looking at our steps and the number of miles we walked.

Average steps in London: 69,894

Miles: 27.94

An Old Friend


I have lost count how many times I have read this book growing up. As a city girl, I yearned to see the beauty of nature that Bibhutibhusan Bandopadhyay describes in Aronyak. He conjured up rural Bengal right in my bedroom with the magic of his words. I truly believe Bibhutibhusan played a major role in opening my eyes to the splendor of nature.

The story follows the journey of a young man named Satyacharan. Unable to find a job in Kolkata after completing his undergraduate degree, Satyacharan accepts a job as a manager in a forested land in the remote parts of rural Bihar, neighboring state of West Bengal. As the young man creates a life for himself far from everything he has ever known, he becomes aware of the vast beauty of nature that surrounds him along with the innate goodness of the villagers who become dear to him over time. The story is about opening of Satyacharan’s sensibilities to the beauty of nature. It is one of the astounding realizations that we are surrounded by inexplicable beauty if we have the eye to look for it. The simplest of wildflowers that bloom every year without fanfare contributes to the glory of nature. Every little composite creates the big picture. Satyacharan discovers it as he falls in love with his surroundings. I discovered it with him as I read Bibhutibhusan’s descriptions of each unknown flower, blades of grass, sunlight shimmering on the foliage, and human kindness.

Maintaining the World Language Collection at my library is my responsibility. I lovingly look at the books in different languages and marvel at the vast wisdom and treasure that these books contain that is locked away from me because of language barrier. But it makes me happy that our diverse community can find themselves in their public library.

Our library system fulfilled my request of including Bengali books in our collection. I visit the collection often to see if I find anything new. I found Aronyak nestled between books by Humayun Ahmed and Jayanta De. I touched it. It took me back many years, reminding me of summer afternoons, our cool bedroom, ma’s presence, and my thirteen year old self completely immersed in the pages of Aronyak, roaming the forests of Bihar with Satyacharan, discovering nature, worshipping nature, finding the divine in nature.

Smells like home


We were posing for pictures in front of Devi Saraswati’s idol at my local Saraswati pujo. My friend leaned towards me and took a deep breath, “Di, did you wear this saree for the first time since you bought it?” I said, “Yes, how did you know? Does it have a new saree smell?” She replied, “No, it smells of Kolkata. It smells of home.”

I remembered this conversation as I brought up and hung my summer clothes today. I wore them all last summer – my kurtis, my salwars, and washed them too. Yet, as I lovingly stroked them and yes, smelled them, I got a whiff of home and of my parents’ love. Baba bought many of those for me. I have written before that he loved going to Dakkhinapan and buying clothes for me, Sean, Sahana, and Ryan. My parents never agreed on anything except the excellent qualities of their grandchildren and baba’s eye for good clothes. Ma grudgingly agreed his choices were good and he could be trusted to buy salwars and sarees. Many of my summer clothes are infused with their love and today I realized that once they tear or get damaged, I will lose that connection. But we won’t get into that yet. The fact is, the clothes are still lovely and I still wear them and remain wrapped in love.

I recently saw a meme that says something about not feeling the need to text when one lands since someone was tracking their flight the entire time. That is love. And that was my baba. I texted them when I boarded my plane from USA. And he sat on his computer tracking my 24 hour journey home. He would shout out often to ma and Gouri that “they are almost to Dubai, 3 more hours”, or “Sumitra, get ready to go to the airport, their plane will be landing in an hour.” They went to the airport way early, hung out, had very sweet, overpriced coffee, and looked up at every traveler coming out from immigration hoping it would be me and the kids.

Baba was a doer. I can’t say I had the closest relationship with him. He worked from dawn till night, had only a day off, when he ate and slept. I cannot imagine a man having any energy left to do anything other than rest. He worked 6 days a week but still couldn’t make enough money to make ends meet. My primary parent was my mother and understandably I was closer to her. As I grew up though, got married, moved far away, and baba retired, I realized that he was a brilliant manager and organizer. He became the manager of the apartment building that they moved into, he organized lavish birthday parties for Sahana every time we went back to India. He made sure everything worked like clockwork when we visited. I remember when all the work was done so that we had everything we needed, he would give a satisfied grunt and call out for a cup of tea. Next morning, he would wake up and ask me, “Aaj ki mach khabi?” (what kind of fish would you eat today?) And like a spoiled brat I would speak my desire, and that wish would be fulfilled. My love language is feeding people. I inherited that from him.

He also found family in strangers and animals. He created this beautiful network of people through social media. They became like family. Some of them tried their best to help me during my time of need when I was desperately trying to keep baba alive. He fed all the animals in our neighborhood, paid to spay and neuter them, grieved when one died.

I find myself often cooking the food that baba liked – lot of postobata, shorshe r jhal. Typical Bengali dishes. He did not enjoy biriyanis or other fancy dishes. Give him Bengali food and he was happy. I learned, late in life, to cook those things.

I went for a walk this morning to a small park with a lovely pond. There is a gazebo where one can sit and look at the water, the birds, the greenery. I could visualize baba sitting there, soaking in the beauty of nature, soaking in the quiet. Born and brought up in Kolkata, the man loved and hunkered for nature. When he visited us in the US, he spent hours sitting in our back deck, looking out into the green, watching the deer who sauntered in, the squirrels, rabbits, and birds. He always said, “I wish I could take this backyard to Kolkata. “

This blog is a stream of consciousness on the day I lost him four years ago. He did not go gently into the night. He fought a good fight. But finally, Covid, and failure of infrastructure won.